Jokes

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Jokes

New postby Robert » Thu Oct 20, 2005 3:02 pm

Hi all, since we hid ythe funny stuff within the other discussion boards, I though we should start a new main subject:
JOKES:

and here is one
---
"Euro-English"

The big news this week was that the European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growi ng publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and af ter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas

----

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New postby Bud » Thu Oct 20, 2005 4:28 pm

I think we're already at stage 3 on most Internet discussion boards. :lol:

Actually, the "And, now for something completely different!" thread is the joke thread, but it is getting a little long in the tooth.

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New postby Jeff » Thu Oct 20, 2005 8:46 pm

Loved the joke!
Jeff
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my friends and alive on my planet!

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Posting for Robert

New postby Bud » Fri Oct 21, 2005 8:33 am

Image

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New postby Robert » Fri Oct 21, 2005 3:53 pm

stranslation a Joke (hopefully it works)
What is the difference between "for free" and "for nothing"?

Andwer
Well my education was for free, your's for nothing

Have a nice weekend,

Robert

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New postby Bill » Fri Oct 21, 2005 4:15 pm

Image

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New postby Bill » Fri Oct 21, 2005 4:17 pm

Image

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New postby Bud » Fri Oct 21, 2005 4:32 pm

:roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao:
:roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao:
:roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao:

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New postby Jeff » Fri Oct 21, 2005 11:00 pm

:arrow: :roflmao:
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New postby Bud » Sat Oct 22, 2005 12:27 am

:shock: Hey, wait a minute.

That's insulting to Bevis and Butthead. :P

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New postby Jeff » Sat Oct 22, 2005 11:55 am

That's insulting to Bevis and Butthead


GOD DAMN IT!
Bud's right.
Ice skating in hell tonight.
Jeff
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New postby MarkS » Thu Oct 27, 2005 3:40 am

Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in
waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht
the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae.
The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef,
but the wrod as a wlohe. Fcuknig amzanig huh?

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New postby Robert » Thu Oct 27, 2005 7:46 am

watch this MS livemeeting

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New postby Bud » Thu Oct 27, 2005 8:18 am

MarkS wrote:Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in
waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht
the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae.
The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef,
but the wrod as a wlohe. Fcuknig amzanig huh?


Maybe that's why so few people bother trying to put the letters in the right order in the first place.

Robert wrote:watch this MS livemeeting


:blink:

Now, that's a Microsoft product we could use.

:roflmao:

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New postby Bill » Thu Oct 27, 2005 2:12 pm

MarkS wrote:Fcuknig...


Sounds German. :wink:

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